Only Four Shopping Days Left

It's really just laziness on my part. If I was an organized person, I would have written a list and stuck to it weeks ago. Everything would be done by now and I would be relaxing at home with the ballerinas baking Gingerbread men, watching the Christmas specials, and sipping hot cocoa. That's not how I roll, though. Nope, just can't do it. So, here I sit with only four days left until Christmas and I have no idea what I still need.

I'm not sure why, but I can't be that organized. When I do make a list and follow it, I usually feel pretty damn proud of myself. Most of the time, if I take the time to write out a list, I wind up leaving it at home and flying by the seat of my pants anyway so that feeling of accomplishment is rare.

I guess I'm just wired differently. By the time Christmas rolls around, I will have made 23 trips to Target (22 of them in search of the same item that I kept forgetting), 9 trips to Borders, 12 trips to Michael's, and wandered aimlessly through the mall for a good 10-12 hours without a clue what I needed.

I've tried to be more efficient with my time. Instead of hitting the gym, I've been counting these excessive outings as my cardio these past few weeks. I see those people walking the malls. That's what they call it. I figured I'd give it a whirl. Guess what? It's not working. Maybe I wasn't dressed properly? In all fairness, I wasn't wearing my Easy Striders, stretchy pants and my I Love My Beagle t-shirt so I wasn't giving it a real college try. Again, just pure laziness.

So, for the next few days, I will continue running walking around the stores guessing at what I still need, freaking out on the ballerinas when they tell me for the 24th time that they can't brush their teeth because they have no toothpaste (back to Target), and praying that come Christmas morning all the presents will have been remembered, wrapped and made their way under the tree.

And, then hopefully I'll be able to get back to this blogging gig more regularly again.

What Am I Going to Be When I Grow Up?

• professional organizer
• fitness expert
  
• thin
  

A Snake in the Grass...and on the Path

Running along the bike path a few days ago, lost deep in thought, I was suddenly stopped dead in my tracks. I let out an audible gasp and the words, "HOOOLLLLYYYYY  SH$T" slowly escaped from my lips. I had just encountered a snake. An almost 2 foot long, black snake with a red belly was stretched out across the pavement right in front of me. I was frozen with fear. Should I step over him? Should I try to go around him? If so, should I step by his tail or his head?  Nope, I just stood there staring at him, braced for sprint if need be, until he finally slithered off the path into the woods.

If you are afraid of snakes as I am, this may seem worthy enough to write about or it may not. But, you see, this is not the first time I've had a run-in with a snake on my daily run/walk. A few months ago, I stepped down with one foot while running in the grassy area, and a snake (I swear it was the same one) coiled back and hightailed it into the woods as I ran by.

I came home this time, told BSD about it, and tried to determine what kind of snake it was. My good friend, Google wasn't a whole lot of help, but I believe it was one of these Northern Red Bellied Snakes, or as I like to call him, The Huge Freakin' Ugly Scary Ass Snake That Won't Leave Me Alone (THFUSASTWLMA)!" At least Google says he's harmless.

Ok...so it's been a few days since my last encounter, and I can't seem to get THFUSASTWLMA out of my head. I've continued my run/walks each day along the same path, and he's had the decency to leave me alone, but I know he's out there waiting. Waiting for me to let my guard down so he can scare the piss out of me the next time he decides to taunt me with his red belly. I'm tense already sitting here at my computer thinking about that moment. I have flashbacks of that TV horror mini series, Harper's Island, I got sucked into watching this summer. I picture THFUSASTWLMA stalking me through the woods just as John Wakefield patiently stalked each of his victims. I KNOW better than to watch horror movies. WHAT was I thinking?!?!?

I started to think about this on a deeper level. What is this snake trying to tell me? Why do I keep running into him...literally? After doing some research into old superstitions and Native American Animal Guides I was blown away to find this information...

Snakes awaken spiritual and magical intuition in the person who chooses this totem or is chosen by it. Snakes are associated with unseen creative forces at work. With the snake totem the powers of intuition and observation becomes keener and more precise. As snakes represent change and intuition the combination of these characteristics will allow for great new developments in life and the proper instinct for deciding which changes will be effective and which should not be made. They represent openness to new experiences, and thus, opened horizons.

Indeed snakes represent versatility, transmutation and change, their natural inclination to “shed their skins” leaving behind the old, and adapting to the new, supports this idea. 


I am not a Pagan, a Wiccan nor am I a Native American, but when the universe is trying to speak to me I guess I had better listen. I can see the writing on the wall. I can make the connection. I am the snake "shedding my skin", trying on new dresses. This blog is the snake representing the creative force that will "allow for great new developments in my life and the proper instinct for deciding which changes will be effective and which should not be made". I am leaving behind the old and am open to new experiences. I get it! I get it! I'm ready!

But, THFUSASTWLMA are red and black really my colors?

An Unexpected Side Effect

Wow! Now that I've started this blog my thoughts are spinning and bouncing around in my head like pinballs.  I am constantly thinking about what I'm going to post next. It's exciting and exhilarating, but also a little stressful. I think I'm putting too much pressure on myself to relate every single post directly to my blog title. I may need to add a subtitle to free myself a bit. Instead of trying on a new dress every time, I may need to just window shop a bit in between, or maybe I'll purge some of the dresses that I know will never fit. Some days may I ask you to just join me for a drink and some idle chat?

On the upside is the positive effect this blog has had on my running. Even just saying that "I run" is a big step forward. For years, I've walked. Walking has always been good to me. It's kept me sane and fairly fit.

I've been walking since I had my first child almost 10 years ago. At first it was a way to calm her down when she was crying. I'd strap her in her stroller and just walk until she calmed down or fell asleep. Then the walk became something more for my benefit than hers. We moved on to the sore back stage. If you've ever walked with a toddler in a stroller you'll recognize this phase. This is where you can barely stand up straight when you're done because you've been hunched over the whole time reading stories and retrieving toys thrown overboard. My walking has been my constant companion through two young children. They have both outgrown the stroller, but I have not outgrown my walks.

For a while now, I've been running a portion of my route. I walk the first half and run the second. Slowly, I've worked my way up to running more than walking, yet I still say, "I'm going for a walk." It seemed pretentious to say, "I'm going for a run." when I barely run 3 miles. It feels like I'm cheating on a good friend to call it a run instead of a walk.

Since starting this blog, I have noticed that the running portion has become easier. My thoughts have taken over so that I no longer dwell on how much farther I have to go. My mind is now running alongside my legs instead of against them. I've started increasing my distance, but oddly enough, my time is not increasing with it. I think my manic thoughts are the reason. They are like the wind at my back pushing me forward.

In the end, if this blog doesn't answer the question of what I should be when I grow up at least the experience will have made me stronger. And if I do wind up finding the right dress after all, my legs should be looking pretty darn good once I finally walk out the door in it!